Total Fucking Sacrelige
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Near Wells in Somerset (the tiny, tiny city), is a place whose name fills me with joy whenever I see it. Here's its official site. Apparently it's revamped, restored and totally remarkable, also bursting and apparently King Kong's going to come there...
I am really fucked off right now. No specific reasons, I'd just like to stick a fragmentation grenade up the universe's arse and retire to a safe distance. Maybe it's the accumulation of all the low-level crap most people put up with from day to day finally spilling over, or the fact that I've been having one of those spells where no matter what you do, work or non-work, someone gets upset about it, an innocent remark or action snowballs into an avalanche of mixed messages, recriminations and random weirdness. Could it be I'm the human* embodiment of the butterfly of chaos theory, possibly it's because I haven't had a pint since Friday or maybe I'm just a misanthropic bastard. Fucknose.
When it comes to music, I don't believe in guilty pleasures. Fuck it, if I like it, I like it. One form of music people really look down their noses at is Southern Rock. Well fuck you, I love Lynyrd Skynyrd and The Allman Brothers, I even like White Witch and Hydra, and if the wind is blowing in the right direction, hell, I'll even listen to Black Oak Arkansas. And enjoy it. The reason I mention this is because there's a killer fucking twenty minute Allman Brothers live medley of You Don't Love Me/Soul Serenade on An Aquarium Drunkard that contains some of the finest southern-fried guitar you'll ever hear and the best two drummer rhythm section ever. So go check the fucker out. Who knows, you might discover yr inner redneck too...
Jeebus*, my jaw hurts like a fucking bastard. The nice people at the teeth factory shot me full of morphine, which was nice, and actually worked for a while. Then it wore off. Not nice. Even the fucking 60mg DHC tablets my doctor prescribed barely take the fucking edge off of the feeling that some cunt is ramming a screwdriver into the joint of my jaw. They do however turn me into some kind of narcoleptic, which means my neighbours are spared, for a couple of hours anyway, the really loud swearing that happens each time the dull background throb spikes into a seriously viscious stab of agony, which happens 2 or 3 times an hour and makes white light flash behind my eyes. Serious pain calls for serious fucking music. I can't be arsed with anything soothing when I feel like this, it just amplifies the unpleasantness. What doesn't tho, is some nice skullscraping sonic violence, music so dense and all-conquering that the brain gets overwhelmed with massive clusters of soundfuck that the immersive state of subconcious concentration one finds oneself in tells the background pain processing centre to shut the fuck down so the rest of the brain can dig this really fucking cool noise. Plus, when the pain crescendo returns, no one can hear the torrent of unbelievably foul language which will inevitably occur. So I've been mainly listening to this little lot over the past few days:
A heavy metal umlaut (aka röck döts) is an umlaut over a letter in the name of a heavy metal band. The use of umlauts and other diacritics with a blackletter style typeface is a form of foreign branding intended to give a band's logo a Teutonic quality. It is a form of marketing that invokes stereotypes of boldness and strength commonly attributed to peoples such as the Vikings; author Reebee Garofalo has attributed its use to a desire for a "gothic horror" feel. The heavy metal umlaut is never referred to by the term diaeresis in this usage, nor is it intended to affect the pronunciation of the band's name.
What I'd really like for my birthday this year is some metal teeth. Either that or to kill the fucking invisible imp which is sitting on my shoulder and smacking me in the mouth with a steel fucking bar. I'd write more but I'm just in the state where the DFs have kicked in just enough to allow me to think but not so much that even remaining seated becomes an impossible feat of balance...
Admittedly it's fucking easy to rip the piss out of both the American government and the insane strains of fundamentalist christianity in the U.S., but that doesn't negate the fact that done well it's truly fucking hilarious. So if you could do with a laugh (and this week they've been a bit thin on the ground) I suggest you shift yr cyberarses over to The White House and The Landover Baptist Church for some neo-con baiting fun.
Go check out the killer new look Morgen Und Nite myspace. Greens and purples and stars in jars abound. Not that I can take any credit for it, being the slack motherfucker that I am, it's all the fine, fine work of the first lady of psychedelic power drone.
1. Make a large pot of Blue Lotus* tea. 10g of the stuff should do you.